Final Words

Working tonight on the text for a funeral ceremony that I will deliver on Friday.  Just a small family group, perhaps about eight people, unless some old army mates manage to come.  It is always a challenge to sum up a life in a few pages and to capture the essence of a person such that the mourners feel that you have done justice to their friend or relative.  Makes you consider also the measure of a life – is it what one has achieved, what one has amassed, or who one leaves behind?

Makes me wonder what I will be remembered for.  Sometimes, putting the wording together is like pulling hens’ teeth although it always works out in the end.  I will probably get up early in the morning to edit what I have written and to put the finishing touches.  I am a morning person and so write with more clarity and purpose at that time.  He was an Elvis fan, so I will finish off with ‘Return to Sender’.

4 thoughts on “Final Words

  1. Duckie – I think it’s really lovely that you’re taking so much time to get the speach just right. It’s always so nice at a funeral when people speak about the person’s life.
    At my grandfather’s funeral, no one spoke for him, and I’ve never really got over this. No one spoke because my Nana didn’t want anyone to get too upset by having to stand up and talk. But me – I was just so upset that no one had honoured this truly lovely man. Even if the priest/minister had been the person to read out a prepared speach, rather than a relative breaking down into tears – anything would have been good.
    So I was the one to write something for each of my grandmothers and for my dad when they each passed away. I didn’t read them out, I had the priest/minister read them out, as I doubted I’d be able to get through a speach.
    I hope all goes well on Friday – I’m sure your heartfelt words will more than do justice to the person’s life 🙂

    • Hypatia, I understand you totally in what you say about your grandfather. It is a pity that people don’t necessarily grasp that it is OK to be sad, and that the funeral ceremony fulfills a very important part in the grieving and farewelling process. Sounds as though you did a good job for the subsequent ceremonies though.

  2. As you know, being a celebrant I get involved in all manner of ceremony and share in some wonderful occasions. There is immense satisfaction though in knowing that you have done a funeral well – both met the needs of the mourners and been true to the nature and personality of the deceased. You are right. It is a privilege.

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